Holiday Expendatures

Several blogs that I read have had "holiday hints" given about what to spend per person for the holidays.  Some say it's a percentage of income divided by the number of people.  Some just give an arbitrary number per person.

For me, I'm trying to curb everybody's interest in giving things and instead giving time this year.  You see, after much reflection, I've come to firmly believe it really is the events and experiences that matter.  Nobody will even remember what the "thing" of any one gift is for more than a couple of weeks.  But fun memories, entertaining antidotes, even shared misery is far more memorable.

This year, for instance, my family received a copy of the new "Clue Secrets and Spies" board game.  It's a highish tech version of the venerable old "Clue" with a cute little black-light wand reader thing.  Over all, it's quite a bit more complicated than the old one.  It took the kids and I probably about three hours of reading/playing/fumbling around to get to a point where we thought we could actually play a game of it.  It was pretty fun, but took more out of us to keep it all straight than the old version.

Those three hours will be far more memorable to both the kids and I than the ten minutes that it took to unwrap the rest of the gifts that they have/will receive.  That is a very frugal/minimal thing to have.  Not the game, but the memories.  Gota love it.

Minimalizing, My Take On It

There are lots of blogs on minimalism on the web these days.  I must say that I enjoy most of them on a fairly routine basis.  One of the key motivations behind this blog was to express my own take on minimalism from my own perspective.  You see, one of the big areas that most everybody else doesn't address much is that of family.  I'm older, have a wife (with a child from a previous marriage), an ex-wife (with whom I have three kids), and my parents, all of whom depend on me.

To say the least, being "minimal" with all of these people around, is a far different and more realistic thing to write on than being a 20-something with nothing but a backpack (and it's 100-things) tackling the world.  Trying to minimize while helping everybody out, financially, time wise, etc. is a large enough challenge for me.

For instance, one of the four kids is in college right now (Hi Tori!), and thankfully is fairly well funded due to her own skills/drives/talent.  She has turned out to be quite the beautiful, smart young woman, and I'm very proud of her accomplishments.  She has a good head on her shoulders, and should go quite far in the world.  I would like to encourage her to read several books that I like, as well as to de-clutter her bathroom counter, but that's another whole story.  How does a minimalist approach fit into this scenario?

Kevin, our oldest son, is doing quite well in school.  He doesn't cause too much in the way of trouble, earns good grades, and in general is kind to pretty much everybody.  He recently earned 6'th place (out of 47) in a local robotics competition (a topic area that is near and dear to my heart).

David, the middle boy, is also doing quite well in school.  He is quite the book worm, in addition to being a Jujitsu aficionado.  Always up for a hike, or really doing anything outdoors, he is by far our most athletic child (having a physique that I can only envy).




Zach is the youngest of our kids.  He is typically almost the academically inclined of the bunch, fretting if he doesn't get an "A" on everything.  He has already won a state wide writing competition (not to mention the cash prize that went along with it), and aspires to write books .



Skill isn't a "missing" thing amongst them, motivation however, does seem to be in short supply some days.  How does one motivate children?  How does one instill the drive that will "push" them each to do all of the extra-curricular activities necessary (as resume fodder) to get the kinds of scholarships that they each will need.  The drive that will "push" them to excel at whatever field of endeavor they embark on after school.  How does a minimalist approach fit into this scenario?

Additionally, I have moved my aging parents into a house next door to mine so that I can help them, when needed (and only then...I really don't want to butt in too much).  However, as they age further they are both going to need even more of my time/money/etc. to avoid becoming institutionalized.  My wife (who blogs about her experiences over at Earning Stars in My Crown), without whom I have very little hope of getting into heaven, helps with their care/groceries/doctors apointments/etc., but is that fair? How does a minimalist approach fit into this scenario?

So, being me, I figured I'd see what I can do to help myself (and all those around me) out from within the morass that I find us in.  That search is the basis for where I intend on taking this blog next.  Its a far cry from some of the others out there, but from where I sit, this is the life I have to pursue right now.

Gift Giving This Year

Many people agonize over what to get someone as a gift over the holiday season. I typically fall into this category. Thoughts such as:

• What can I afford?
• Do they already have one of these?
• How will this compare with what everybody else is getting them?

But of late, I've come to understand that many of these thoughts are driven both by the economy, as well as by the corporate world's influence (via their tools of advertisements, planned obsolescence, and perceived obsolescence).  Very little of it really relates to what gift giving is really about:

• What is something USEFUL that the other person would appreciate?
• What do I wish to give as a token/reminder of my LOVE for the other person?
• What is something I can buy THAT WILL ENDURE long term?
• What is something that can be passed on in it's own time?

Given these thoughts, I've decided that most of my "gifts" this year will probably be durable goods that have been found used.  Let's face it, some of the things made before 1940ish are still among the best (having lasted 70+ years is a good track record).  Re-gifting, re-cycling, whatever you want to call it, also helps out the environment.

So instead of attending a Black Friday sale of some sort or the other, go to a garage sale to look for gently used things.  Go to half.com, eBay, or CraigsList and consider buying used.  You get to claim several moral high-ground points:

• You spent time looking for the "perfect" gift
• Nobody else in the world is likely to have the same thing (especially if it hasn't been produced in the last 20 years or so).
• You prevent something that still has some useful life from going to the land fill (of special interest to those of a more environmentalist bent).

Addtionally, you typically get it for a very reasonable price.  WIN WIN WIN.

Hamfest Followup - and a Plea.

Well, the Texhoma Hamarama was a blast. Spent basically three days either getting ready for it, attending, or putting things back together. Didn't get the big dollar items sold (still holding out hope for the OK Traders list), but I did clear enough stuff to pay for my admission, the table space I rented, etc.

Additionally, my half.com has been doing pretty good.  There have been a number of their "suggested prices" that have blown me away.  Like $50+ for "The Preppy Handbook"...I mean, DUH?!?  The stupid thing listed NEW for $3.95.  Oh well, such is the fun of seeing what things are worth.  Here's hoping I get closer to the max on these books...it'd be way cool.


In the battle to downsize, I donated most of the "smaller" things (a full van load in itself) from the sale to the local Salvation Army store.  I also gave a van load of computer books and various magazines to the Ardmore Public Library for first, their collection, and if it fails to make the cut, the Friends of the Library sale.


As such, I have a plea to my local friends and readers...go by these places and purchase the stuff, ok?  I really don't want any of it to end up in the landfill, but I fear that is pretty much where most of it will end up.

The Hazzards of Cleaning

Well, just spent the better part of the weekend cleaning, sorting, organizing, pricing, etc., for the Texhoma Hamarama that will be going on here, in Ardmore next weekend.  I have probably a van and a half of stuff to go, all zip-locked, priced, etc.  Some of the more "ham" related things, I've also listed on the OK Traders list.

In addition, I just setup a half.com account to try to off-load my 11,000 pounds of books (somewhat).  I expect to put many MANY MANY more things as time goes along.  I just have to let my eyes uncross from looking at UPC/ISBN numbers for a while.

But let me tell you, as much work as this has all been, as tired as I feel right now, the biggest hazard is what the dust I stirred up has done to my allergies.  I'm one big sneeze...here's hoping for some income to offset all of the stupid allergy pills I'm going to be taking for the rest of the week.

The Utter JOY of Cleaning

I must say, I like cleaning...NOT...

Don't get me wrong, there's a beautiful sense of peace that seems to just spring forth from a cleaning job, well done.  It is what is driving the whole "Minimalism" craze right now...and I'm all for it.

But the process of GETTING THERE...that's another matter.

When you were raised by dust bowl survivor parents who saved and reused just about EVERYTHING, its hard to get a good head of steam built up about cleaning.  When I moved my parents a few years ago now, and found the infamous "can-o-nails," it struck me that part of my problem is my upbringing.  I was told, from a very young age, that you saved and reused EVERYTHING...not just the stuff most likely to actually be useful...EVERYTHING...

So when I grew up, I too saved everything.  Books (17 full height bookcases loaded to the gills with 11,000 pounds of books and magazines).  Electronics (I have a separate HOUSE just to hold all the dead VCRs, TVs, etc. that MIGHT be useful).  Wood (I recently had to throw out some that had fell victim to rot).  It just didn't matter.

This is the level of unlearning that I must go through.  Several other bloggers have outlined some very simple rules that I've been trying to put into practice over the last few dozen hours of intense work.

• If you've not looked at it recallable history, toss it.
• If you are unsure of something, put it in a box and mark it with today's date.  Seal the box and store.  If you don't reopen to box in a month, you probably didn't need it in the first place.

But part of my heart is still bound up with this stuff.  My books, for instance, are crying out "give us to the library for their collection."  Ah ha, I said, a good plan.  However, upon talking with the local library folks, they have an internal process where three folks in any one department review any incoming book.  It has to pass mustard for all three of them before it goes on the shelf.  Otherwise it is off to the "Friends of the Library" sale.  <<sigh>>  I just cannot have my books out of my house and still accessible in the library I guess.

That's part of my pain.  Here in southern Oklahoma there just isn't a good market/outlet/etc. to donate most of this stuff to.  I'd love to have a "Maker's Space" somewhere near by, that I could offload most (if not all) of my electronics stuff (both the new stuff as well as the dead VCR's and the like).  I'd love to have my library, pretty much EVERY LAST book, be granted placement in someone else's public library space nearby (so I could use it when needed, but didn't have to personally store it all).

Further, as this end of the state doesn't even have a e-Waste disposal facility, all I can do (sadly) is toss it in the dump.

Sad.

Fun...let's all have MORE OF IT

There are few commercial advertisements that I agree with.  But the one that suggest "have a family game night" is one of the few that I do agree with.

Just getting out a good board game, deck of cards, etc. and doing it up "old school," or working through the complications of doing one of the new collectible card games...so long as all are of the "right" age to follow along...it is all good.  Doing such old simple games like:

• Canasta
• King in the Corner
• Nine Men's Morris
• Pente

The games that seem to play the best around our house are those that everybody has the chance to win...youngest to eldest...especially the games where a major change of circumstances can happen at a moment's notice.

The larger issue is that if everybody can be engaged in the game, playing with and understanding the rules, time simply doesn't play that much of a role in the whole "I'm bored" cycle.  If you are fully engaged, you don't need to go raid the refrigerator for a snack.  If you are fully engaged in the game, you don't need to fight over who did dishes/trash/kitty litter/etc. last.

Reuse...not ReBuy

One of the best things we can all do, both for the environment as well as for the "story of stuff" is to repair, reuse, repurpose "stuff"...not re-buy/replace.

It's not a new idea, and has been the thing that people fall back on time and time again when money was tight.  During the Great Depression (something both of my parents lived through), such thriftiness was commonplace.  You never tossed anything out that you could reuse.  Reuse and scavenging things for recycling later was how everybody made ends meet.

I recall the fact that when I moved my folks recently, I came across several old tin cans in the garage, full of nails, screws, and bolts that had been recovered, "cleaned up" a bit, and saved...for one day it might be needed and rather than spending money, this one would work.  I recall as a small child, my dad would pull nails out of wood, both to protect us kids from falling on them, as well as to hammer out straight and to save for reuse.  The wood would be saved in a great pile in the garage for reuse also (typically sliding it under the car, between the tires, so as to make the most of that space too).

Today however, such thrift is almost a lost art.  How to save things, as well as knowing what is worth saving, is a hard thing to discover...not to mention a far more complicated decision these days.  Is the old out of alignment VCR worth keeping, knowing that to get it formally repaired (if you can even find someone willing to do it) will cost more than just replacing it with something new, worth it?  Is the five to seven year old car that you've already paid off worth keeping, now that the A/C has given out?

There's also the modern day issue of what to do with those things you save.  Nobody wants, plans, or chooses to end up on some TV show about hording.  Few people want to actually own storage facilities for just keeping track of all the spare bolts, VCR's, etc. that they've salvaged.  It costs more and more money to do so...paying for the building, insurance, heating and cooling of such storage facilities alone can run to many thousands of dollars.

So what are we to do?  I have a proposal that I'd like to offer up as a possible solution.  Let's resurrect another Dust Bowl/Great Depression sort of behavior.

SHARING.

Those that have such modest "spares" lying about share them with others who don't.  In more affluent areas, older buildings that would otherwise be abandoned might be re purposed to be neighborhood tool libraries/parts warehouses/fix-it-up shops.  Neighbors could bring things in that they no longer wanted, put a post-it on said item saying whether or not it worked, what was wrong with it, etc. and abandon it in place (but not in the land fill).  Then others could come in and tinker with it (using the tools in the library).  If they get it to work again, they can change/amend the post-it saying so...and either abandon it in place, take it home themselves, return it to the original owner, etc.

It is almost like a "makers space" type of shop, but more of a "fix-it space".  Many of the same concepts could be leveraged...and many makers space places could be a fix-it space also.  It just makes sense.

People helping people, sharing their time and talent for the betterment of the group.  That kinda defines what it is to be a good neighbor.  It's what most Christians are called to do.  It builds bonds between people.  It tends to give kids a "leg up" in the realm of understanding the mechanical world around them.  It saves the planet an extra bit or twelve of trash in the dump.

What's not to like?

Living Smaller

For many years now, I've been looking at living smaller, both in the amount of stuff that I have to keep up with, as well as the size of the "box" that I put it all in.  Sadly, right now, this is very hard for me to actually do, as I have a family of six that I'm helping house.  But in the general stream of "eventual lefts" I'd like to take, downsizing my life is one of those big things that makes considerable sense to me.

In most of the areas of my life, this is not really a huge challenge.  But there are two specific areas that it will be a massive challenge for me, namely tools and books.

Tools are difficult because with them, you can do so many "other" things...like build small houses (see "Little House on a Small Planet", "The Small House Book" and others).  You can be crafty (see "Maker Spaces", "Instructables", etc.), you can help out friends when their stuff breaks, etc.  Also being the son of a former hardware/housewares store owner, I both know good tools when I see them AND had easy access to getting them.  Further, as a new slum-lord of sorts, I've increased the collection of "construction tools" quite a bit of late, trying to fix up the rental property I have.

Books are the other seriously hard thing for me to prune down.  When I recently moved, I had a moving company come in and give me a quote on boxing up everything and moving it.  They counted 17 full-height (72" high or better) book cases and quoted me almost $4000 just to box up 11,000 pounds of books.  And this was about five years ago.  To say the least, as I read and collect books rather voraciously, and time marches on, my collection has grown.

Both of these areas are things I'm neither ashamed of, nor that I can bring myself to see as evil.  However, when trying to make them jibe with the whole "live smaller" theme, it is quite the contradiction to have to resolve.  It will be hard to do, as both my collection of books and tools has grown since my last move.

When the time comes, I think the best I'll be able to do is to trim things down to a smallish kit of things that make sense to me as "maintenance" things...both books and tools...and then to give the rest of it away.  The books to a local library (hoping they'll keep them in their collection...not just dump them into the "Friends of the Library" used book sale) and the tools to either seed a local or extend a near by Maker Space.

Hello, it's "Just Roland"

Having been bit by the blogging bug, I thought I'd give this a go.  I've been looking for an outlet for several competing ambitions of late.  Namely, they are loosely around the following goal areas:

• Organizing one's life into
• The needed
• The wanted
• The silly
• Downsizing to be somewhere between the needed and wanted
• Not abusing the planet (general environmentalism)
• Redefining/rediscovering "fun"

To achieve all of this is a bit beyond my immediate goals, but I believe it is still something to work towards.  As such, there are a number of different projects/tasks that I've undertaken of late to see just where I am in life, versus the goals listed above.  Some of the more interesting ones have come to me via other web/blog posts on some of the following web sites:

• David Michael Bruno: 100 Thing Challenge
• Simple Productivity | Zen Habits 
• The Story of Stuff 

During the course of my initial "brain dump" on these topics, I intend on covering each of the various areas listed above, along with the why and how I see them as related.  Please bear with me and see where this goes.